Good afternoon all !
Earlier this morning, I received a message from a friend, recently relocated to Edmonton, Canada. Surprised by the time of the message due to the time zone, I was carefully reading her message where she was describing all about the new facts in her life. Everything was fine according to what I was reading, but... I felt that something was not. I decided to give her a video call in order to watch and listen to her.
She was really excited and after a torrential and detailed narration of her everyday life, she paused. I was waiting her to continue, but nothing... Suddenly, she burst into tears !
I didn't know what to do and how to react... ! (not so easy through a screen....).
Trying to calm her down, I wanted to understand what have caused this "explosion".
After a while she sprung the story... Yes, everything was as it was expected to be. The country, the city, the house, her job...
So, what was wrong ?
She was feeling lonely. Realizing that the distance could not allow her short trips combined with the difference in time zone not being able to contact her friends and family as usual, created this reaction.
Indeed, relocation is something really exciting as a procedure, but there are also some hidden "side effects", especially when someone is single. When families move altogether, things are not so bad, since one supports each other until they find their place in the local community. In the case of a single expat though, it's truth that loneliness could knock your door.
Not everybody can be prepared but could think that this may happen. The issue here is if you will either choose loneliness to be a friend or an enemy.
Starting from the last option, in the case of feeling terrible about this situation, that would result not only to make you feel blue, furthermore it would affect your general attitude against your new life. The most likely would be to lose invaluable time and distort everything around you.
Try to find the positive part in this situation and consider this loneliness as an opportunity. You have the chance to act totally independently, to go wherever you want - whenever you want. Discover the neighborhood, the city, every little corner of this new area.
Don't let time passing by whining. Grasp every minute, be open and adventurous !
Talk to the grocer-baker-butcher. Even if you don't speak the language, I can reassure you that even a couple of words, can open doors and moreover can open your social circle. Of course, there may be people being more conservative or coy. It's ok. Try to make the first step. Small steps each time.
Greet them with an honest smile (don't be giddy !), ask them some information about the place you live. You cannot imagine how many volunteers will you find to help you.
But as I told you, the situation will evolve step by step. Some people are more open than others. Some others need their time.
Be patient and grasp every opportunity to socialize and be part of the community.
In any case, respect the new environment. Furthermore it would be perfect to learn some facts about the areas taking into consideration that this will be your new place to live.
Above all, be yourself, be honest and open to meet and know better the members of your new life.
You both deserve a chance, don't you think ?
